Sleeping With A Snorer

Learn how to convince your husband to see a sleep specialist and why it's really important. From the ADVENT series, "Confessions of a Snore Partner".
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Published on
July 13, 2021
Updated on
February 15, 2023

"How I convinced my husband to take his snoring seriously..."


Confessions of a Snore Partner

My husband and I have been married for almost nine years.

And - don't tell him this, but - he's pushing 40.

He's an avid outdoorsman and is a mason and laborer, by day. So he's quite physically active and never shies away from letting me know that his doctor tells him that he's "healthy as a horse."

And to that, I say, "Horse hockey!"

Pre-existing medical conditions

He undoubtedly is strong and relatively lean, but he also has a pesky nicotine habit - that no amount of nagging in the world has gotten him to shake. He's also been diagnosed with polycystic kidney disease. This means he's been taking blood pressure medication for about 5 years now since hypertension is a common side effect of this hereditary condition.

Also, growing up with a big brother and lots of rough-housing boy cousins, his nose has been broken so many times, I don't even know how it would look if it were actually straight. I'm no ENT specialist, but if someone told me he had a deviated septum, I wouldn't be surprised.

So, to say he's perfectly healthy is a bit of a stretch for me...

"Plus...he often snores like a chainsaw. A chainsaw that idles steadily, then vigorously revs up, sputters, conks out and then revs backup again."

My husband snores like a chainsaw

Truth be told, he snores loudly; like a chainsaw. A chainsaw that idles steadily, then vigorously revs up, sputters, conks out then revs back up again...to only repeat the same vicious cycle over and over again.

Not only does it keep me awake, he often wakes himself up at night or when napping on the couch.

Contrary to what he may believe, I actually do want him to live a long and healthy life with me by his side. So I refuse to ignore the fact that there may be bigger issues at play.

Chronic snoring is a symptom of sleep apnea

I've done some research on how to cure his chronic snoring, and what it means to have sleep apnea. My dad has been diagnosed, as well as a few coworkers, so I know it is relatively common.

But what I found left me worried. The sounds he makes in his sleep go beyond just an annoying pattern that literally keeps me up at night. Obstructive sleep apnea is detrimental to his health.

Undiagnosed sleep apnea is a health risk

Most people suffer from sleep apnea, and go undiagnosed. They ignore it and unwittingly suffer from its side effects. And many times, it leads to their cause of death. But because it's misunderstood and so under-diagnosed, you'll rarely see sleep apnea on a death certificate.

It's putting stress on his heart. And because of his kidney disease, he's already in jeopardy. Upon some deeper digging, I have begun to explore the idea of him getting his snoring checked out and have planted the thought in his mind.

I explained to him how, not only is his snoring and gasping for air at night impacting me - I'm often battling headaches and brain fog from long nights of insufficient rest - it's also impairing his health. And that because of it, he's at a higher risk of stroke or heart attack.

The good news is there are simple treatments available

Plus, when your family history already includes a long list of these ailments, you don't want to further stack the deck against yourself, especially when there are simple treatments available.

When I broached the topic, his first response was that there was no way he wanted to start sleeping with a CPAP machine.

Convincing my husband to see a sleep specialist

But I told him all the ways ADVENT was different.

They don't just throw a mask at you with an insincere "good luck on going at it alone", they actually investigate your anatomy to properly identify the root cause of your snoring. Plus, their treatments are fast and easy and non-invasive. They'd deliver him a treatment plan that was actually made specifically for him - not just a one-size-fits all strategy that costs us a ton of money and provides little to no results.

Even with his stubborn ways, he's started to see the light and he's been optimistic and open-minded about seeking help.

He's starting to come around and realize how much hope there is for us both to get better rest at night, so that we can enjoy many more days together.

Read the next Confessions of Snore Partner here: The Rampant Mind: A Casualty of Second-Hand Snoring

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First published by ADVENT on
July 13, 2021
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