Snoring Partner Q&A on The Morning Blend

Snoring Partner Q&A
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Published on
March 15, 2021
Updated on
March 15, 2021

Dr. Madan Kandula went on The Morning Blend to answer questions people posted about their snoring partners and how it affects their relationships.

[Tiffany] To sleep well, you need to breathe well. Welcome back. It's our continuing series with ADVENT. Snoring can cause a sleep divorce with many couples, that's right. And if you're a new newlywed, that's no way to start a marriage is it? Our sleep and snoring expert, Dr. Madan Kandula is board certified. He is a sleep and sinus surgeon, and CEO of ADVENT. Hello, doctor.

[Dr. Kandula] Hello, good morning, good morning.

[Tiffany] So good to see you. We asked our Facebook friends last Friday how snoring impacts their sleep. And we've got a ton of questions for you. So you ready to get going?

[Dr. Kandula] Yeah, ready to rock.

[Tiffany] All right. Okay, the first one is, this one says, we fight more now that my partner's snoring is waking me up. Could it be related?

[Dr. Kandula] Yeah, well, I don't know about the rest of your relationship, I'm not giving relationship advice. But I would say, yeah, almost assuredly. We talk about snoring or, and/or sleep apnea being like an intruder that's sneaking into somebody's bedroom. And sort of, what that intruder is doing is is really hurting somebody's airway. It's when somebody snoring that's somebody's airway crying out for help at night. And so when you're sleeping next to a snorer, that sound is both annoying and it's also frightening. And it's sort of, the next morning when the intruder leaves the sort of what's left behind is the damage that's been done. So it's damaging the person it's happening too, but it's certainly frustrating for those around that person, especially if you're in that same bed. And so relationships are hard enough, everybody knows that. And so the last thing that you need is to have sort of a day of interaction ruined by a nighttime of snoring. It just, there's nothing good about it.

[Tiffany] Yeah, I can imagine. I mean, we're all cranky when we don't sleep, right? The next question is, I wake up two to four times a night from my husband's snoring. How is this affecting my health?

[Dr. Kandula] It is, of significance. And so, sleep apnea and snoring issues are one of the few issues, I gotta think harder, but I have not, I can't think of another one that impacts those around individuals like snoring and sleep apnea do. And so the snorer is impacted, but if somebody's next to them who's waking up a few times during the night. That sounds sort of relatively harmless, but sleep is crucial. So make no mistake about it, sleep is mandatory. It's not a nice to have, it is a must have. And so if you're not getting good quality of sleep you're going to sort of pay the toll for that at some point. It leads to other health conditions. So if somebody's not sleeping properly, on down the line of all the things that you don't wanna have happen will happen. And unfortunately, it's the person that's laying next to you that you love, who's sort of friendly fire is creating issues for the person that's sort of sitting there. And so it's not only frustrating, it's sort of, I think the person that's getting kept awake by snoring, they understand the frustration that's involved there. But there is a health toll, there's a mental toll, a physical toll that, again, there's nothing good about it. So nobody wants to snore. Nobody wants to sleep next to a snorer. And so it's really a matter of sort of raising your hand and saying, there's a problem here and we need to do something about it.

[Tiffany] I like what you said, it's not a nice to have, it's a must have, sleep. I think that's a perfect takeaway from that too. The next question I want you to answer is, she said, the noise from my husband's C-PAP bothers me more than his snoring. Are there other treatments available?

[Dr. Kandula] There are, although I would ask, I mean a C-PAP machine is a machine that folks wear who have sleep apnea, that holds the airway open. So the newer machines are generally pretty quiet. It's usually like a fan. So I would just sort of question if the machine that they have is the latest and greatest, or maybe it's outdated, so, you know. But yes, there are folks who can be kept awake by fans, and C-PAPs, and other things. And so I'd say a C-PAP machine is a solution, or a potential option for folks, but there are many other options. An option that works really, really well for a lot of our patients is an oral appliance. That's like a retainer that you can wear when you're sleeping at night. It makes no sound. All it's doing is it's sitting in your mouth between your upper and your lower teeth. And it's keeping your mouth shut, but it's also pulling your lower jaw forward. So it's something that internally is holding somebody's airway open. A C-PAP machine is an external device that sits on your bedside, and it's got a hose, and it's pushing air in. So either way your airway is held open. One makes some noise because it's a machine that's pushing air in there. The other one doesn't because it's not a machine, it's really a retainer. So, both can work. There are other options other than that, but I would say, for folks who are bothered by the noise of C-PAP machine, and the machine is actually working okay, an oral appliance almost, is very likely to be a good option.

[Tiffany] Yeah. We only have a minute left. And I wanna try and get through two questions. So let's try and do these quickly. The next one is, my husband isn't concerned because he sleeps through his snoring. What can I say to motivate him to get help?

[Dr. Kandula] I really, it's challenging. And so I don't have a great answer other than sometimes pointing to the ramifications that it's having on this individual. So if somebody's snoring, or they have sleep apnea, again that's taking a toll on them. And so things like heart attacks, strokes. I think a big one that gets people's attention is erectile dysfunction. So if somebody is sitting there, laying there snoring, and it's a male, basically they're announcing to the world that problems are gonna be coming down the line. And I know a lot of guys, no guy wants that coming their way. So I'd say that might be a little trump card you could play.

[Tiffany] No girl does either, that's true.

[Dr. Kandula] No.

[Tiffany] The last one, as quickly as you can here, is sleeping in separate bedrooms a good solution? Sounds like it could be related to the last one.

[Dr. Kandula] Yeah, there's a whole different direction I can go there, but yeah, it's not a solution. It is a band-aid that you're putting on the situation, and you're saying, this problem is bad. I'm gonna get out of here. And we're just gonna separate. And, once you start that pathway moving forward, that pathway of separation, maybe things are gonna be okay. But stranger things have happened. And couples separate and never get back together because it starts in the bedroom.

[Tiffany] Yeah, not good, not good. Thank you so much for joining us, doctor. That was fantastic.

[Dr. Kandula] Thank you, thank you.

[Tiffany] Absolutely. Dr. Kandula has offices all over Southeastern Wisconsin. You can visit them in Wauwatosa, Mequon, Oconomowoc, Oak Creek, and Pleasant Prairie. You can call them at 771-6780. Email them at Insurances are accepted as well.

First published by ADVENT on
March 15, 2021
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Snoring Partner Q&A on The Morning Blend